


Caught in the Act

by MechBull



Series: Follower Appreciation & Tumblr Meme Ficlets [1]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-12
Updated: 2015-09-12
Packaged: 2018-04-20 08:35:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4780805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MechBull/pseuds/MechBull
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>unbreakablejemmasimmons asked for: Fitzsimmons + private detectives AU. I put my own little spin on it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Caught in the Act

“Magic Dragon, this is Stealthy Fox. Come in, Magic Dragon.”

“What did I say about code names, Skye?”

“ _Stealthy Fox_. Don’t blow my cover, man.”

The only response was a sigh, and Skye crossed her eyes and stuck out her tongue at her phone. Then she let out a giant sigh of her own and brought the camera back up to her eye. She adjusted the zoom a bit to make sure it was in focus when the time came to snap the incriminating pics. If the time ever came.

“How’s it going?” Coulson asked.

She shook her head. “Honestly. This is the most boring affair ever. They’re leaving room for Jesus between them on that couch, boss. Lots of room.”

“Really? What are they doing?”

“Watching TV, I think. Well, they do keep glancing over at each other when they think the other one isn’t looking. And then they both blush and look away. It’s very high school.”

There was a long pause. “An emotional affair, then. Can be just as devastating but harder to make it hold up in court.”

“And not what the woman scorned is paying us for. You want me to hang around here a bit longer?”

“Up to you, I guess.”

“Eh,” Skye replied with a shrug. “Not like I have more exciting plans for my Saturday night. Neither I nor Mr. Ward will be getting any, it looks like.”

“OK. Keep me posted if anything changes.”

He hung up then, and Skye looked through her camera again. “Ooh,” she murmured to herself. “Getting a bit interesting now,” she observed, watching as the Other Woman scooted a little closer and rested her head against Ward’s shoulder. 

The wandering philanderer of a husband looked down at his maybe-mistress and smiled softly. He bit his lip, then cautiously lifted his arm and wrapped it around her shoulders. Ugh, it was almost too cute. Skye shook her head and reminded herself that he was a cheating bastard and that even if these two really did seem like they belonged together, her loyalties were to her paying customer.

Even if she too would run as far away from Mrs. Ward as she could, if she were unfortunate enough to be bound to her in holy matrimony. Skye shivered, and not just because of the cold night air.

She took a moment to rub her arms briskly and think longingly of Tahiti, where she, May and Coulson had celebrated solving their 1,000th case last summer. 

“Kiss her already,” she grumbled.

And God damn it – slash – thank God, when she raised her camera again, she realized he had followed her instructions. They had gone from puppy love to porn stars fast, and Skye wondered how long that had been simmering. No point in wondering that too much, however, because she had a job to do. She took picture after picture of them – practically devouring each other’s faces, clothes flying, hands gripping the couch cushions (all she could really see once they stretched out and laid down), his knee dropping to the ground as he scooted further back (Coulson had mentioned in passing that Ward was fluent in several tongues, and he was apparently showing her just how cunning a linguist he was), and then – bam! – the money shot as they finally rolled off the couch and onto the ground. She hoped Mrs. Ward was capable of identifying her husband by his pale ass alone, because Skye got a whole lot of pictures of it as it clenched with every thrust. 

Skye felt exhausted herself, and maybe just a little dirty, as they both appeared to climax. She turned off the camera and packed it away. She glanced up at the window one last time, not able to see as many details without the zoom lens, but she wasn’t going to complain about that.

“Hope you enjoyed yourself, Grant,” she muttered. “Because your prenup isn’t worth diddly now.”

She turned the key, cringing as her old van spluttered to life. She loved her baby, but she was going to have to use her cut of the booty (heh, booty for catching the booty) on some auto repairs if she didn’t want to draw unnecessary attention to herself on nights like this.

The drive back to the office was relatively quick, and she wasn’t that surprised to see Coulson was still there. She held up the camera triumphantly. 

“Got him.”

“You did?” 

“Mmm. Guess he got tired of playing at just friends.”

“Let’s see,” Coulson responded, holding his hand out. Skye gave him the camera and he quickly pulled the card out and plugged it into his computer.

Skye fell into her seat and tilted her head back with a groan. Why is it, she thought to herself, all these gross guys were getting their itch scratched and she hadn’t even had a date in months? She loved her job, really, but she wished she did have better things to do with her weekends. 

“Skye,” Coulson said, his voice annoyed and yet strangely amused.

“Hmm.”

“You read the whole file I gave you, right? Looked at the pictures, everything.”

She felt her heart start to race. “Uh…right. Cover to cover,” she said, surreptitiously crossing her fingers in the hope that the human polygraph that was her boss would miss the obvious lie for once.

“And what does Grant Ward look like?”

Skye hesitated. “Skinny little dude with curly hair, she said optimistically.”

Coulson sighed, facepalming. “Where did you even take these?”

“Apartment 325, Building G!” Skye answered defensively.

“Building _H_!”

Skye gaped, her mouth opening and closing as she searched for an answer. A frustrated whine was all she managed. They stared at each other for a long beat, and then she smiled as endearingly as possible. 

“Well, they really _were_ adorable, so I guess, just this once, true love wins.”


End file.
